Emoticons

Recently I stumbled upon the universal emoticon. It works for everything. EVERYTHING. :-/ Go ahead, give it a try. No matter what you say or how you’re feeling, it is universally encompassing. This is a scientifically proven fact. I have posted my research here for you to examine and see for yourself. I also encourage you to test my theory on your own. It’s especially effective in g-mail chat.

I farted :-/
You’re fired :-/
I just started my period :-/
I missed my period… :-/
I’m pregnant :-/
And it’s yours :-/
... Maybe :-/
I’m gay :-/
I gave you gonorrhea :-/
Mom’s dead :-/
You’re adopted :-/
I slept with your husband :-/
… It could be HIS baby :-/
Your husbands gay :-/
You’re funny :-/
No Bishop, I didn’t sleep with my boyfriend :-/
… I slept with yours :-/
Awkward :-/
It burns when I pee :-/
I wouldn’t drink that if I were you :-/
I love you :-/
Grandma loves me more :-/